Looking towards the open window, I saw light wreaths from Joe's

pipe floating there, and I fancied it was like a blessing from Joe

- not obtruded on me or paraded before me, but pervading the air we

shared together. I put my light out, and crept into bed; and it was

an uneasy bed now, and I never slept the old sound sleep in it any

more.

Chapter 19

Morning made a considerable difference in my general prospect of

Life, and brightened it so much that it scarcely seemed the same.

What lay heaviest on my mind, was, the consideration that six days

intervened between me and the day of departure; for, I could not

divest myself of a misgiving that something might happen to London

in the meanwhile, and that, when I got there, it would be either

greatly deteriorated or clean gone.

Joe and Biddy were very sympathetic and pleasant when I spoke of

our approaching separation; but they only referred to it when I

did. After breakfast, Joe brought out my indentures from the press

in the best parlour, and we put them in the fire, and I felt that I

was free. With all the novelty of my emancipation on me, I went to

church with Joe, and thought, perhaps the clergyman wouldn't have

read that about the rich man and the kingdom of Heaven, if he had

known all.

After our early dinner I strolled out alone, purposing to finish

off the marshes at once, and get them done with. As I passed the

church, I felt (as I had felt during service in the morning) a

sublime compassion for the poor creatures who were destined to go

there, Sunday after Sunday, all their lives through, and to lie

obscurely at last among the low green mounds. I promised myself

that I would do something for them one of these days, and formed a

plan in outline for bestowing a dinner of roast-beef and

plumpudding, a pint of ale, and a gallon of condescension, upon

everybody in the village.

If I had often thought before, with something allied to shame, of

my companionship with the fugitive whom I had once seen limping

among those graves, what were my thoughts on this Sunday, when the

place recalled the wretch, ragged and shivering, with his felon

iron and badge! My comfort was, that it happened a long time ago,

and that he had doubtless been transported a long way off, and that

he was dead to me, and might be veritably dead into the bargain.

No more low wet grounds, no more dykes and sluices, no more of

these grazing cattle - though they seemed, in their dull manner, to

wear a more respectful air now, and to face round, in order that

they might stare as long as possible at the possessor of such great

expectations - farewell, monotonous acquaintances of my childhood,

henceforth I was for London and greatness: not for smith's work in

general and for you! I made my exultant way to the old Battery,

and, lying down there to consider the question whether Miss

Havisham intended me for Estella, fell asleep.

When I awoke, I was much surprised to find Joe sitting beside me,

smoking his pipe. He greeted me with a cheerful smile on my opening

my eyes, and said:

"As being the last time, Pip, I thought I'd foller."

"And Joe, I am very glad you did so."

"Thankee, Pip."

"You may be sure, dear Joe," I went on, after we had shaken hands,

"that I shall never forget you."

"No, no, Pip!" said Joe, in a comfortable tone, "I'm sure of that.

Ay, ay, old chap! Bless you, it were only necessary to get it well

round in a man's mind, to be certain on it. But it took a bit of

time to get it well round, the change come so oncommon plump;

didn't it?"

Somehow, I was not best pleased with Joe's being so mightily secure

of me. I should have liked him to have betrayed emotion, or to have

said, "It does you credit, Pip," or something of that sort.

Therefore, I made no remark on Joe's first head: merely saying as

to his second, that the tidings had indeed come suddenly, but that

I had always wanted to be a gentleman, and had often and often

speculated on what I would do, if I were one.